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Like many I am ambivalent about Twitter. It works mainly as a global guff-stream where commonfolk and celebrity swim side by side amid currents of fatuous flotsam about their banal existences.

Of course I use it a lot. After all most of my family and pals would say a pretty banal sort of a guy. And a massive hypocrite. For a blogger Twitter becomes more of a seamy canal-side street in Amsterdam. I prostitute myself on there on a daily basis: pestering fellow twunts with posts they almost certainly have no interest in.

I have spotted three participants from this summer’s Ashes series. It comes as no shock to see Graeme Swann on there, a man whose metaphorical head is almost as big as his actual one. It’s the perfect platform for his brand of self-regarding wiffle. I shouldn’t grumble, it’s just this kind of bluster that gets under the collective Australian skin.

My eyebrow raised a millimetre or so more when I saw that Swann was following Jimmy Anderson. I think I just assumed that because he was from Burnley he’d sooner be off racing pigeons in his spare time than get himself involved in this Twitter shambles.

An even bigger surprise was to see that there’s an Aussie on there: although we can forgive Phil Hughes because he’s only little. I do have a difficulty with the egregious amount of exclamation marks polluting his tweets. Five !s in a row should only be used by overexcited prom queens or people who have no idea what punctuation is.

I would commend you to click onto the link to his website though. I’m not sure if Hughes intended his site to reflect his batting technique but it does: unconventional, unprofessional-looking but quite entertaining. Most of the content reads like the slightly more tedious pages of a Conference football programme but the photo album is certainly worthy of a look, in particular snaps of a trip back to his hometown of Macksville.

Here’s one of my favourites: Hughes parading in his homeland from the sun roof of some souped-up motor. He looks like the Pope’s rebellious son (unlikely as that concept is) clutching an obligatory can of VB as if it’s his rosary beads. I’m starting to really like him. I’d estimate that the site gave me about ten minutes of amusement.

Twitter is brilliant.

Pope Philip I

Pope Philip I


Written by harrisharrison

July 21, 2009 at 8:42 pm

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