It Happened Last Night
Until this morning England hadn’t won a test match in Australia since 1994. I’m excluding games that don’t count. The occasions when the Australians having already claimed the series, pitched up in a groggy post-Christmas haze with the Jacob’s Creek stains still down their whites.
And now England have won a meaningful fixture. This won’t go down in history as one of the great test matches. Classic games have an ebb and flow. In Adelaide, there was just flow. Or ebb, depending on your perspective. Australia have ebbed so much since their last home series that they can’t see the beach anymore. They’re treading water out in the ocean while England make sandcastles and gorge themselves stupid on Calippos.
It’s virtually incomprehensible for any England fan who can only remember the last two decades of cricket. I only wrote this post so I could believe it more. You’ve probably guessed that it wasn’t designed for your entertainment.