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Archive for December 2011

A Pointless Nerd Analogy

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This blog is rapidly degenerating into a conduit for my contributions to the Huffington Post. I have to point these articles out to you otherwise you wouldn’t know they were there.

Think of the HuffPost as a novelty box of retro sweets. The political comment pieces are the Wham bars. The cultural reviews are the chewy Drumsticks. The celebrity blogs are the fizzy strawberry laces. There’s a particularly interesting one written by Martine McCutcheon who explains how yoghurt changed her life.

My review is the single loose Nerd at the bottom of the box. You probably don’t want to eat it because you’re just coming down from the sugar rush of reading of how Susan Boyle conquered her demons.

Here’s the Nerd anyway.

Written by harrisharrison

December 14, 2011 at 9:53 pm

There Are No Tits Here. Hazel Irvine’s Or Otherwise.

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A few weeks ago I reported that this blog had been laid siege to by a deviant of the worst order. Some diabolical pest has typed in “Hazel Irvine tits” into a search engine, one would have to presume to ogle at images of the diminutive Scottish sportscaster’s breasts.

I am sad to relay that affairs have darkened since. The fiend has visited again, three times. Firstly he or she landed following the query “Hazel Irvine sex tits”. I may be naive but I don’t know what a “sex tit” is. I’m pretty sure it’s bad though. And again today, two more hits: “snooker Hazel Irvine sex tits” and “snooker Hazel Irvine sex titss” reveals some sickening fetish for Hazel Irvine in sexy bar game situations. As well as negligent spelling.

I urge this person to reveal themselves, figuratively speaking obviously, and perhaps some kind of support can be sought. There are people who can treat you, injections they can give you. I know a good surgeon if necessary.

Written by harrisharrison

December 11, 2011 at 7:11 pm

Down With The Trumpets

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I’m blowing my own trumpet again. If you are fortunate to have your own trumpet, what else are you going to do but blow it? It would be a waste of a good trumpet otherwise. That said, I do possess an electronic keyboard which I seldom play, except to amuse myself with its built-in helicopter sound effects. I can play Twinkle Twinkle Little Star in chopper. It’s become quite a hit in Dalston.

Anyway, here’s the my latest piece for the HuffPost.

Written by harrisharrison

December 3, 2011 at 12:55 pm

Posted in Cricket

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